Role Playing

Song Lyric of the Day:

And now as I stand / And stare into your eyes / I see safety there / I want surprises / What I really need to do / Is find myself a brand new lover

Dead or Alive / “Brand New Lover”

6:22PM.
As I wait for the HVAC guy to get here and give me an estimate on our Florida room, I thought I’d go ahead and start discussing what seems to be a theme today: role playing.

I was channel surfing the radio this morning on my drive in to work, and landed on the morning show on Star 102.1 where the hosts, Marc and Kim, were in the midst of discussing role playing. They took phone calls from listeners who shared their stories about role playing and discussed their own stories. Which led me to wonder, why do we role play? And I’m not just talking about the spice-up-the-bedroom-life type of role playing (which has no doubt saved countless relationships). How often do we play to what others expect of us? How much have you changed who you are to conform to what others want you to be?

Which leads me to Oprah’s show today. Her big guest was Lance Armstrong‘s ex-wife. I expected Mrs. Ex-Armstrong to discuss her marriage to Lance, but instead she went off on a tangent about how she lost herself in her marriage. She blamed her marriage for why she was no longer the independent, opinionated woman she’d been before getting married. She was joined on this tangent by Oprah’s resident female shrink–with a book to shill, no less–who also complained about how her own marriage made her lose herself. They also had an engaged woman who is doubting her impending marriage because she doesn’t see how she can continue to be herself, including being friends with people she’s known for years.

I gotta say, I really disagree with what they had to say. Marriage–and relationships in general–don’t dictate what type of person you become or change into–you do. I’m not saying that relationships don’t influence you; it’s a given that they will. But how you respond to this relationship stimuli is still up to you. I will once again freely admit that getting married helped me come out of my shell and become a much more social person; it changed me for the better in that regard. I’m also much better at compromising, thanks to a low Rich and I had to hit in our relationship. But did I stop voicing my opinions, lose my independence, or stop being friends with people I knew before I met Rich? Absolutely not. We’ve worked hard to build a strong marriage, and I’m really proud of that. My friends are his friends now, and his friends are my friends. And Rich is still the artistic, creative, independent man he was before we got married.

I guess my bottom line is that the idea that marriage forces you to change who you are is a load of crap. And I felt like sharing that.

9:16PM.
Big blog announcement–my awesome hubby created an email application. So for those of you who don’t feel comfortable leaving comments (neglecting my need for instant validation), you can email them to me instead.

The email tool is located in the right navigation bar below the Rocky Top Brigade and Toplist icons. Under the obvious “Contact Me” heading.

11:04PM.
I just read my friend, Brent’s, blog, and you have to check it out. His latest post, No Casserole For You!, is hysterical. What can I say? The man is a natural storyteller.

*Note to Wentworth and Enrique: You can email me now. Seriously. Email me. Now.