Song Lyric of the Day:

But they tell me / I’ll be fine / That it will all get better / Just try to write it down / Or put it in a letter / But the words won’t play / And there’s no / Easy way to say / Goodbye, goodbye

Natalie Imbruglia
/ “Goodbye

I had to step back for a while, pretty much from everything. On July 26, only 31 days after losing my baby Yum Yum, our sweet, 13-year-old girl Snoops left us, too. I imagine a lot of non-pet owners can sympathize some, but my fellow pet owners know how devastating losing a pet is. And to lose two of my babies only a month apart … I can’t even express it in words. Especially when the two of them were so close — Snoops falling in love with her kitten from the first day she set eyes on him; Yum Yum playfully swatting her on the butt to get her to wrestle; the two of them sleeping, side by side; right up to Snoops’ obvious mourning once Yum Yum was gone, which we watched hasten her decline.

While Rich and I were heartbroken over having to take that final trip to the vet with Snoops, we did what we could to make sure her last afternoon was filled with her family’s love: We called our family, and my parents and sister Vanessa were able to come over to say their goodbyes to her. Snoops responded to that, even raising her head and smiling, which she hadn’t been able to do for a while. So she definitely felt her family’s love, despite all of our tears.
And when that awful time came at the vet’s office later that afternoon, I gave her countless kisses, one for each family member and friend who loved her, and many more just from me and Rich. I think that actually helped a little, really, just a little in the grand scheme of things — but it helped nonetheless — knowing that so many of the people close to us loved her and would miss her, too. But nowhere near as much as we would.

Once home, I cried as I showed Caleb his big sister’s collar, which I had very gently removed from around her neck once she was gone (she would’ve hated feeling naked without it). I think he’d already figured out that she wasn’t coming back, and that was all I could think to do to help him really, truly process it. Because if there was one certainty, it was that Caleb knew his big sister always, always had her collar on.

Rich, Caleb, and I dealt with our grief in our own ways. So did our cat, Belle; having known Snoops since the day I brought her home, and having grown even closer to her dog since Yum Yum’s passing, Belle walked around caterwauling the first few nights, looking for Snoops. Troubadour, being just under six months old at the time and having only been with us for three months, didn’t feel Snoops’ absence the way we did. But, if anything, he ended up helping the rest of us. Because it’s impossible not to laugh and smile when you have a puppy. And in the weeks following her death, when Caleb would sit quietly by himself in a corner, looking as heartbroken and depressed as a dog can look, it was Troubadour who got him playing again.

*My little dog – a heartbeat at my feet. – Edith Warton


Filed under caleb, dogs, goodbye, grief, pet loss, snoops, troubadour

4 Responses to Snoops

  1. Anonymous

    Thank you for writing about Snoops. We were so glad that we got to say goodbye to her. I know Tru didn’t understand what was going on, but he made me laugh when he stole my tissue out of my hand to destroy it. Snoops adored you and she had a great life because of you. We will all miss her. She was a good girl.

    Love you,

    PS That dog LOVED her Grandma’s Puerto Rican rice and beans!!!

  2. Jonnie

    So sorry to hear about Snoops….She was such a great dog, and will be missed. Hope you are well. Call me sometime and we’ll catch up.

  3. Anonymous

    Pattie, I also thank you for writing in your blog again and sharing about Snoops this time. You were so good to her.
    She knew she was loved. It really showed. The two bottom pictures tell a great story also. Two unique dogs with two unique relationship stories.

    Love you,
    Momma Carol

  4. Anonymous

    My dearest Patty,
    I knew that you would resurface, but I also knew that you needed all the time & space needed to heal. I lost my Charlie over 15 years ago and I will never ever forget him or the love I felt for my beloved cat. I have even dreamed that he and my BFF who died about the same time are waiting for me in a place of joy and peace; I guess most people would call this "heaven". I am glad that you are writing again! Love you, love you, love you.
    Titi Bea

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