Resolute

Song Lyric of the Day:

‘Cause all we need is love / And love needs sacrifice / But it’s sure worth the prize / If you get it right (eh!) / ‘Cause way up in the sky / There’s no such thing as blind

Young Rising Sons / “High

Last year I wrote that my only real new year’s resolution was to be happy. And, well, this year that’s also pretty much my only resolution. Easy-peasy, right? No pressure. I’m tired of trying to make everyone happy. I’m tired of living under a cloud of perpetual self-made stress. I’m tired of waiting for people to forgive each other. I’m tired of certain individuals’ nonstop negativity. I’m tired of negativity in general.

I say all this as an inherently negative person; I work hard to not be so negative all the time. I was not born with a sunny disposition, nor did I grow up in a happy, Leave It to Beaver-esque home. I’m a glass-half-empty-and-full-of-poison type. The term “bitchy resting face” (BRF) was coined because of/for people like me (the struggle is real, people). You get the picture. So I am choosing to just focus on being happy and what I think will make me happy.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m not going to take up skipping everywhere and holding hands with neighbors while singing “Kumbaya.” I’m not going to walk around with a smile plastered on my face because (A) it only exaggerates my BRF (don’t ask me how) and (B) it’s just plain creepy to walk around like that.

I’m going to continue enjoying the me time that I have, when I have it. I’m going to sleep more because I fucking love sleep and need way more of it to feel human.  I’m going to catch up with friends I haven’t been able to see or talk to in a while. I’m going to keep taking my dog on walks so he doesn’t get out of shape (Caleb was essentially his personal trainer). I’m going to keep journaling, which I haven’t done regularly in years; I’m using My W Days on my iPad. I’m going to keep saving up for the new camera I want — the Canon EOS 70D — and hope I get to buy it sooner rather than later. I’m going to keep writing because it’s fun getting lost in worlds and with characters I’ve created. Most importantly, though, I’m going to keep spending as much time with Coraline as I possibly can since she is the most genuinely happy person I know.

Happy girl

Coraline goofing around on a neighbor’s tree stump

 

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