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My Happy for the Day: "A-Punk"

It’s the rare album that Rich and I (1) both love, (2) fight over which of our vehicles the CD gets to “live” in, and (3) both love to play over and over and over. Vampire Weekend‘s eponymous debut is that agreed-upon album for us these days. We’ve had it for several months now, and rather than getting tired of it, our love for it grows each day, the way our love increased tenfold for Troubadour once he outgrew peeing all over the house. It’s unconditional. The whole album is just fun, with clever, witty lyrics, catchy melodies, and amazing, beautiful musical compositions. And did I mention how much more fun my workout playlist has become since adding some of their songs to it? Behold the beauty of “A-Punk,” arguably one of the catchiest of all the catchy songs on the album. If this song and video don’t make you at least crack a smile, do me a favor and hurry to the doctor. Because I’m pretty sure that means something’s wrong and I’m worried about you.

Lyrics:
Johanna drove slowly into the city / The Hudson River all filled with snow / She spied the ring on His Honor’s finger / Oh-oh-oh

A thousand years in one piece of silver / She took it from his lilywhite hand / Showed no fear – she’d seen the thing / In the Young Men’s Wing at Sloan-Kettering

Look outside at the raincoats coming, say OH

His Honor drove southward seeking exotica / Down to the Pueblo huts of New Mexico / Cut his teeth on turquoise harmonicas / Oh-oh-oh

I saw Johanna down in the subway / She took an apartment in Washington Heights / Half of the ring lies here with me / But the other half’s at the bottom of the sea


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Warning: Don’t Step on the Ducks

Song Lyric of the Day:

I’ve seen those English dramas too / They’re cruel / So if there’s any other way To spell the word / It’s fine with me, with me

Vampire Weekend / “Oxford Comma

10:08PM.
Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven.

When they get there, St. Peter says, “We only have one rule here in heaven: Don’t step on the ducks!”

So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw.

St. Peter chains them together and says, “Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!”

The next day, the second woman steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn’t miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman.

The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps.

She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on … very tall, long eyelashes, muscular, and thin.

St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.

The happy woman says, “I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?”

The guy says, “I don’t know about you, but I stepped on a duck!”

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