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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 20

Day 20. The last argument you had

I don’t remember what causes most of the arguments I have, so I’ll go with one of the few I do remember. It was while I was pregnant with Coraline. Rich thought it would be a good idea to share with me some artwork he was working on of his ex-girlfriend, as well as the (sweet, he alleged) story behind it. I argued that maybe that wasn’t what his pregnant wife cared to see. He didn’t get it. It took him a few days to come around and agree that maybe it wasn’t the best idea in the world to show his pregnant wife artwork featuring his ex-girlfriend. And yes, he did apologize. Also, no I never bothered to ask to see that artwork.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 19

Day 19: Something that never fails to make you feel better

I can say sex, right? This blog challenge warrants honesty, so I’ll go ahead and say sex.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 17

Day 17: Things that make you scared

Ah, this list could go on forever. I already wrote about the horrific political climate. In addition to that, there are plenty of other real-world things that scare me: terrorism, health epidemics, the possibility of economic and social collapse, my recurring nightmare of being in a car accident, home invasions, being terrified of dying young and leaving Coraline without a mom, family and friends dying. Real, legitimate fears.

There also completely unrealistic things that scare me. Which is largely where my love of horror movies bites me in the ass. Despite knowing better, I usually end up watching scary movies when Rich is out of town. Which then makes me paranoid and reminds me of other scary movies, all of which basically are about the worst possible kind of home invasion: The Purge, You’re Next, The Strangers. I won’t get into how horror movies have also made me worry about camping and trick-or-treating.

Finally, there are these fuckers:

image

Wavy tubes are the devil’s advertising. Image found via Google search and Satan’s guiding hand.

 

Completely unnatural and totally terrifying.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 15

Day 15: The best thing to happen to you this week

After last week, I’ll go with the obvious: no family members have received grim prognoses, no one has passed away, and no one else has been diagnosed with cancer.

Fucking cancer made last week a living hell for me and many of my loved ones.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 14

Day 14: Something disgusting you do

I’m going to go with something I do that never fails to gross out the spouse: I snack on Pringles with ketchup. Which I LOVE. And the very idea of which makes Rich want to barf, which I don’t understand — to me it’s the same principle as fries with ketchup. He vehemently disagrees with me on that point. No matter what he thinks, though, this is still one of my all-time favorite snacks.

Just add ketchup!

Just add ketchup!

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 13

Day 13: A date you would love to go on

Most of my and Rich’s dates consist of dinner and a movie. Assuming money wasn’t an issue, I guess a dream date would be somewhere far away from everyone and everything, and where we didn’t have a set agenda and could take our time deciding what to do. I’d also love to do something we’ve never done before: a hot-air-balloon ride, renting a boat for a weekend, visiting a new-to-us country (Spain, anyone?). Needless to say, this date would also involve Coraline overnighting at my parents’ house.

Since those kinds of dates are literally just dreams, I will continue to enjoy and appreciate the rare dates we enjoy these days, which are often dictated by a big Marvel movie release. That’s right — our next date night might very well be the day Captain America: Civil War comes out.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 12

Day 12: Things you want to say to an ex

I don’t want to say anything to my ex. But if you put a gun to my head, I guess this is what I’d say, in no particular order:

  • I’m sorry for your loss.
  • I think you and your family need sensitivity training when it comes to dealing with someone with an alcoholic in the family.
  • I’m glad you and your brother married a Hispanic and Asian woman, respectively. Way to stick it to your racist parents!
  • I wish we’d stayed broken up the first time.
  • Thanks for showing me what I didn’t want in a significant other, because I definitely traded up.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 10

Day 10: Your views on drugs and alcohol

I’ve talked a little bit before about having grown up with an alcoholic father. Which is where I should stop and give him a shout out for his 24th year of sobriety. But the years he was a drinker definitely screwed up my views on alcohol — how could it not? I didn’t really try drinking until I was 25. I still don’t drink very often. Rich likes to tell me my vice is not having a vice, and it’s true. You know how at the doctor’s office you always have to check the box detailing your alcohol consumption? There’s not an accurate option for me, which would be less than one drink a month (on average). The way this week has been going, though, my monthly quota has already been met and will likely be surpassed.

I joke a lot about drinking or getting drunk. I don’t know if that’s normal for someone who grew up in my situation. I’m guessing it’s a coping mechanism. It lets me show that I’m in control of how much and when I drink, that I don’t routinely grab the nearest bottle when things get too rough or to take the edge off. So what is my view on alcohol? Seeing as how it’s still America’s drug of choice, honestly, if Prohibition made a comeback, I’d be OK with that. Although I would miss having the occasional wine cooler.

As for drugs? I’m not a user of, well, anything. Never have been, never will be. I did try some “magic” brownies once, and I’m glad I never tried pot in college. I would’ve gained the freshman 1500 based on the epic munchies I got; I wanted to basically eat all the food on the planet after those brownies. Then I fell asleep. But did I get some euphoric high, a relaxed feeling, feel the stress melt away, whatever it is pot is supposed to make you feel? No. As for anything harder than that … Narcotic painkillers make me barf. When I’ve had to be on them, it’s been miserable. Doctors would have to prescribe an anti-nausea medicine for me at the same time, which combined with the painkillers would just knock me out for a day. No fun.

I don’t understand why people turn to drugs when things get so horrible. OK, I do — they want an escape, to numb themselves to whatever is going on, but knowing that the hard stuff like heroin/oxy/cocaine/meth is addictive? Why willingly open yourself up to that kind of addiction? Have I struggled to find coping mechanisms over the years? Absolutely. And I still do, which is where therapy came in handy. Did I want to escape, numb myself to what was going on? Yes. But never once did I think drugs were the answer. Probably because I know the likeliness of addiction thanks to my soused genes.

I have mixed feelings about the legalization of pot. While it doesn’t do anything for me — and I never plan to try smoking it (or anything else, for that matter) — I think it can be used recreationally. I think it does some good for legitimate medical reasons, which it seems like a lot of people can’t claim. But, like with alcohol consumption, I worry about how many people would drive while impaired. And I hate the smell of pot. That was one of the worst things about being in Colorado last summer, walking through clouds of it and trying to shield Coraline from it. It’s enough that I have to deal with regular cigarette smoke when I’m out and about. I don’t want to deal with pot stink, too. But could I live with pot being legalized? I think I could.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 9

Day 9: Your last kiss

It was last night, when Rich was consoling me as I cried about a dear friend entering hospice.

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30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 7

Day 7: Your opinion on cheating on people

And here I was complaining about lightweight questions just a few days ago. Ask and ye shall receive.

Frankly, my opinion on cheating on people is that it’s reprehensible bullshit. I think it’s awful even when you’re dating and not married; I hate when people say “Oh, they were just dating.” If you’re in a committed relationship, you should honor that commitment, be it dating, living together, marriage, whatever. If you love your partner, you shouldn’t stray. If you value trust and honesty, you shouldn’t stray. If you respect them, you shouldn’t stray.

Relationships are hard. I call bullshit on the people who say they never fight or even have little disagreements; I believe those are the ones most likely to implode thanks to holding in everything. Relationships take work, and that work includes honoring the person you’ve made a commitment to. Granted, my perspective is as a long-time married. Has our marriage always been easy? No. Have we had some knock-down, drag-out fights? Absolutely. But do we work at making our marriage work on every level? Every single day. We both believe in upholding our wedding vows, and those vows applied to the two of us. No third parties allowed.

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