No Words

Song Lyric of the Day:

You’ll never hear me complaining, I’m certain the sun will shine / I don’t care how the weather vane points / When the weather vane points to gloomy / It’s gotta be sunny to me, when your eyes look into mine

Louis Armstrong / “Jeepers Creepers

I haven’t run out of things to say (the hubby can vouch for that). I might not always find/make the time to update here, but I still have stuff to say. There are still words I want to write. Rather, the “No Words” title of this post is a mandate issued by my doctor in the last couple of weeks to rest my eyes. That’s right: My doctor literally said “no words.”

Work has been so busy of late (yay, job security!) that there have been nights where it has felt like my eyes were going to fall out of my head; it even hurt to blink at times. With other life stressors wearing me down mentally, physically, and emotionally these last few weeks, the strain of looking at a computer screen all day has really gotten to me via blurred vision, dry eyes, and near-constant headaches.

So my doctor said, “No words,” when it comes to downtime. Which means no reading my book, no reading news or blogs online, and no updating this blog. Instead I’m to watch TV or a movie, or play a game on my phone or iPad (helllllo, Candy Crush Saga). So that’s how I’ve been spending short breaks away from my computer screen during the day. I’ve also tried stepping outside on the patio more, for the fresh air as well as to distance myself from the temptations of reading, both my book and online. I’ve not only barely updated here the last few weeks, I’m now behind on reading my favorite blog. First-world problems, I know. But I’ll catch up again soon enough, after my peepers have had time to recover.

Image courtesy of Unique-Optique.com via a Google search.

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Counting Back to One

Song Lyric of the Day:

Hey, little baby, what would you say / If I took you further away? / Countdown’s begun / Counting backwards to one / On and on, the endless debating / You get home, but nobody’s waiting / Countdown’s begun / Five, four, three, two, one

Beautiful Small Machines / “Counting Back to 1

The last few weeks have been rough, so stressful that at times it was next to impossible to see any light at the end of the tunnel. You know the saying “your worst day is your worst day”? My worst day kept repeating itself. Add to that stress the grief over Grandma Lee‘s passing, and I have been one hell of a weepy, moody, anxious mess for seemingly forever now.

Things have finally turned a corner recently, with a big, positive change that I (and Rich) had been waiting for for some time. It doesn’t solve all of life’s current problems, but it certainly helps and, to me, at least, it feels like a MASSIVE weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I can finally start to look forward and feel optimistic about things again. Because when I go to my dark place it is really fucking dark, and I was worried I wasn’t going to make it out of there alive. So here’s to making it out (relatively) sane and looking forward to, well, everything again.

I discovered this band, Beautiful Small Machines, via Pandora, and their music has been a bright spot for me of late (I also LOVE “Superconductor,” which my fellow Castle fans might recognize.) Add to that the fact that Bree Sharp is in the band, and I am one happy fan, since her song “David Duchovny” is my go-to karaoke song. OK, would be my song if I ever sang karaoke. Alright, I’m probably never going to sing karaoke, but I DO sing the shit out of that song. In my car. Alone.

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Photoblogging: Bouquet

This bouquet was waiting for Coraline and I when we got home Monday night. With 100% certainty, Coraline declared, "It's from my godCaren mommy." She was right -- her godmother had indeed sent this beautiful bouquet and a lovely condolence note about the passing of Grandma Lee.

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Photoblogging: A Book of Memories

This is the beautiful hardbound book my aunt-in-law sent Coraline commemorating her meeting her Great-Grandma Lee for the first time. We think Coraline will grow to love this book as much as we already do.

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Grandma Lee

Song Lyric of the Day:

Somebody saved me from the world you left / If you’re gonna cry my tears / If you’re gonna hold my breath / If you’re gonna let me see the sun you set / Oh, I am lost and found / Oh, I am lost and found

Katie Herzig / “Lost and Found

My grandmother-in-law is being laid to rest this morning in Iowa. Grandma Lee passed away last Thursday after suffering a stroke. And even though she reached the impressive age of 99, I think I took it for granted that she would live forever — she was just so spunky and full of life that it’s hard to imagine that life would ever come to an end.

I first met her back in 1998 when I accompanied Rich to Iowa for the first time. Grandma Lee was a tiny little thing — tiny but mighty. Mighty enough to have raised four kids. Mighty enough to have been a nurse. Mighty enough to beat breast cancer. And lord, was that woman quick with a comeback. Her snappy wit could (and probably did) cause whiplash in those fortunate enough to be witness to it.

The last time I saw her was September 2011. It’s really hitting home for me that the last time I saw her was truly the last time I would ever see her. Which is why I’m writing this through yet more tears. But I was lucky enough that my last visit with her was also the first (and only) time she would meet her great-granddaughter Coraline, which was a wonderful thing to behold. Coraline was almost 1 year old and more interested in running around the nursing home than sitting still, but I still managed to get some nice shots of her with Grandma Lee. While Grandma Lee didn’t quite remember me, she did remember her grandson Rich and knew that Coraline was his daughter.

I wish with all my heart I could be there with our family in Iowa to not only say my final farewell to Grandma Lee, who treated me like one of her own grandkids, but to be there to console my husband and father-in-law and our many other relatives as they lay this sweet, incredibly beloved woman to rest. I may be mourning from afar, but I hope everyone there knows I’m with them in spirit.

After our visit to Iowa, Rich’s Aunt Linda sent Coraline the most amazing birthday present, a hardbound book of photos from our visit with Grandma Lee. And while Coraline will never remember on her own meeting her great-grandma, Rich and I will never forget.
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Photoblogging: Angry Face

You won't like Cora when she's mad.

I asked Coraline to show me her angry face, which first made an appearance last Wednesday (7/3/13). I see this as a somewhat frightening glimpse of the headstrong teenager she is going to be. God help Rich and I. (Photo taken 7/5/13)

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Scene From a Marriage #31,974

After explaining to Coraline what a submarine is:

“You know, I’ve been on a submarine.”

“20,000 Leagues Under the Sea at Disney World doesn’t count.”

“Dammit.”

“I know how you think, boy.”

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Photoblogging: Mother’s Day 2013

Today was pretty much the best Mother’s Day I could have hoped for. I thanked Rich and Coraline repeatedly throughout the day for making my day so incredibly special, fun, and memorable. Getting to swing by my parents’ house to wish Mom a happy Mother’s Day was the icing on the cake. And now, because it’s late at night and I have to get ready for bed and work tomorrow, I’m just doing a quick little post to commemorate the day. I’ll *try* to write more in depth tomorrow night since we did a lot today. I hope all my fellow moms had a great day, too.

Me and Mom Mother's Day 2013

Me with my mom, who I am lucky enough to live close to. Notice the tiny person popping up in the lower right-hand corner.

Mom, Coraline and Me Mother's Day 2013

I absolutely love this photo of me, Mom, and Coraline. She's still wrapping her head around the fact that her Abuela is MY mom.

Coraline and Abuela Mother's Day 2013

I love this photo of Coraline and her abuela more than I can say.

Cora and Mommy Mother's Day 2013

During bedtime, I realized I forgot to ask Rich to take a picture of me and Coraline, so I set my camera's timer since Rich wasn't around right then. I got Coraline to smile like this by promising we'd work on a puzzle together. This sweet little girl is my heart and made my Mother's Day so wonderful. (With help from her dad, of course.)

 

 

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Scene From a Marriage #31,915

While discussing our concurrent stomach illnesses:

“We need to buy more crackers. We need to buy Saltines. We need the most boring cracker known to man.”

Throwing his arms in the air: “Here I am!”

Falling over laughing: “Oh my God.”

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Happy 13th Anniversary to My Husband

Song Lyric of the Day:

I belong with you, you belong with me / You’re my sweetheart / I belong with you, you belong with me / You’re my sweet

Lumineers / “Ho Hey

What can I say after 13 years together that I haven’t already said? Rich, you are still my best friend, the best friend I’ve ever had, in fact. Not only do you continue evolving as a wonderful, loving, supportive partner, your continuing evolution as a father leaves me in awe. I also have it on very good authority that Coraline is quite fond of you; you are the “fun” parent, after all (or so she tells me). Thank you for being our everything.

love,

me

Rich and I on our wedding day, April 8, 2000. So young ...

Our family 2013

Rich, Coraline, and I on our 13th anniversary today.

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