After successfully introducing Coraline to the original Star Wars trilogy:
“Great. Now that she knows there’s another trilogy, she wants to watch those, too. I’m not sure I can handle watching those again.”
“We’ll treat her decision to watch the prequels the same way we’d deal with her becoming vegetarian or vegan: We will respect her decision, but she’s on her own.”
Filed under scene from a marriage
After she asks me to put on a TV show called Little Charmers:
“So what’s Little Charmers about?”
“It’s about these girls with magic powers and they do charms and fly around on brooms.”
“Oh, so they’re witches.”
“They’re not witches, they’re Little Charmers.”
“You said they do spells and fly around on brooms.”
“I said they have magic powers and do charms and fly on brooms.”
“You do know that’s pretty much the literal definition of a witch, right?”
“THEY’RE NOT WITCHES! THEY’RE LITTLE CHARMERS!”
“I give up.”
Filed under conversation with coraline
Singing: “Bow-chick-a-wow-wowww.”
“Um, where did you hear that song?”
“From E at school. Bow-chick-a-wow-wowww.”
“I’d prefer you not sing it, OK?”
“Why not? It’s fun. I love singing it!”
“Because I said not to, OK? I don’t like that song.”
“Well, I do.”
“Well, I don’t.”
Sighing: “Fine.” A minute later, sotto voce: “Bow-chick-a-wow-wowww.”
Filed under conversation with coraline
“Mommy, I really want a baby sister.”
“I know. Tell your father since I can’t do anything about that without him.”
“Yeah, because he needs to be at the hospital to help when the baby is born.”
“Well … that’s, uh, part of it.”
Filed under conversation with coraline, personal
“Look, Mommy! They have little dresses for little kids!”
“Those aren’t dresses.”
“Yes, they are.”
“No, they’re people clothes.”
“Oh. Look! There’s another little dress for little kids!”
“Again, that’s not a little dress. You know what? I’ll come back another day by myself.”
Filed under a conversation with coraline, coraline, humor, parenting
“What are you going to do if she goes to college out of state?”
“We can move to be closer to her. You know, in case she needs to come home to eat, do laundry, hang out.”
“So you’re going to stalk her.”
“If moving just to stay close to someone and watching their every move is your definition of stalking, then yes, I suppose so.”
Filed under scene from a marriage
After driving out of our neighborhood on the way to day care:
“Oh my God! I forgot my phone!”
“Really? You never forget that.”
“It’s OK. I can go home at lunchtime to get it.”
A few blocks from day care:
“Oh my God! I left my work laptop at home!”
“Are you OK?”
“Ugh. I’ll drop you off at work then go home to get it.”
A few blocks from work:
“Oh my God! I forgot my wallet! It’s still in my camera bag from Coraline’s ballet class last night.”
“What is going on with you? You’re like me, but on crack.”
As he’s getting out of the car and looking through his backpack:
“Aw, crap! I left my wallet in the garage!”
Laughing my ass off:
“Oh my God! We’re senile!”
Filed under humor, marriage, relationship, scene from a marriage
Pointing: “Can you buy me that book?”
“Which one?”
“The one with the wedding girls.”
“That’s not a book. It’s a bridal magazine.”
“What’s that?”
“It’s to help women plan their weddings. And you are not currently planning your wedding.”
While flipping through the pages of the magazine: “Because I still need to find my prince first.”
“You’re three. You’ve got a few more decades to go.”
Filed under conversation with coraline, coraline, humor
“What does … chocolate milk turn into?”
“Pee.”
“What does … chocolate turn into?”
“Poop.”
“What does … candy turn into?”
“Poop.”
“What does … water turn into?”
“Pee.”
“What does … the fox say?”
“Ni ni ni ni ni ni ni.”
Filed under a conversation with coraline, coraline, humor, personal
“I’m going to have a baby sister.”
“Oh, you are now, are you? Because that’s news to me.”
“Yes. And she will be named Baby Gaga!”
“You know that wouldn’t be her real name, right?”
Filed under a conversation with coraline, coraline, humor, personal
