Category Archives: personal

May 12, 2014 · 8:00 AM

Photoblogging: Mother’s Day 2014

Yesterday I enjoyed a low-key Mother’s Day, my fourth as Coraline’s lucky mom. We started the day with brunch — Coraline’s favorite meal — at The Egg & I, our first visit and one of the few places with a less than two-hour wait. Then we came home, where Rich and Coraline presented me with cards and presents. Coraline’s card made me cry (Rich chose well), while Rich’s was sweet and heartfelt. They gifted me with Lily Allen‘s new album, Sheezus, which I really like; a gift certificate to my favorite Italian restaurant, Altruda’s; and the Evil Dead Blu-Ray, which is a huge deal. It’s a huge deal because while I LOVE horror movies, Rich does not. At all. So he really took one for the team, because now that I own it, he knows there’s a chance he might have to watch it with me. That’s a good man right there. As far as Coraline is concerned, it’s a “people” (read: adult) movie that she can’t watch for a very long time.

Rich then offered to watch Coraline so I could enjoy a solo trip to Barnes & Noble without my tiny bookworm in tow — so luxurious. After the bookstore I went to my parents’ house to give Mom her card and presents. Coraline will be personally presenting her abuela with her Mother’s Day card today; we knew she’d want to do that herself. I got home, hung out a bit more, then when Coraline went down for her nap, I passed out on the couch with my cats. Then it was time for dinner, which we picked up from a nearby restaurant, and more family time. All in all, it was another great Mother’s Day. I’m really fortunate to be mom to such a fabulous kid, which I would never be without an equally fabulous husband.

Speaking of, said husband indulged me and took some pics of me with our curly-topped cutie to commemorate the day.

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Coraline insists she be called Darth Vader when wielding this little inflatable light saber.

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A kiss from Mommy

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Smiles

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A kiss from Coraline

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A BIG kiss from Coraline

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She’s very into making silly faces for photos these days.

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Me and my little girl

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May 9, 2014 · 8:45 AM

From the Heart

Coraline made this for me at day care. She told the teachers what she wanted to tell me, and they wrote it on this little butterfly made from tracing her hands. It’s the most perfect Mother’s Day present I could have hoped for. Artwork like this makes day care worth every cent.

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Butterfly Hands

I hope all my fellow moms — to both little humans and fur kids — have a wonderful Mother’s Day this weekend. I know I’m looking forward to spending it with my favorite curly-haired munchkin.

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May 8, 2014 · 8:30 AM

The Numbers on the Scale

Song Lyric of the Day:

Would you let me see beneath your beautiful? / Would you let me see beneath your perfect?

Labrinth featuring Emeli Sande / “Beneath Your Beautiful“

For the past few weeks I’ve gotten back into something of a fitness routine. I’m now on three weeks of only taking the stairs at work (my cube is on the third floor), I walk the track at work when I can despite the ridiculous heat these days, I’m wearing my pedometer again to track how many steps I take each day, and I’ve started using our home gym again. I’ve even worked up to running part of the time I’m on the treadmill, which I usually have set on 3.9MPH, a speed at which I can easily maintain my natural native New Yorker walking rate. We’ll see how I do when I increase the speed soon.

Coraline is curious about what constitutes exercise. She loves pointing out that those runners we passed, the soccer players we saw, the kids shooting hoops were all exercising. Rich and I have explained to her that exercise is a way to stay healthy: It gets your heart pumping harder, which is very important since our hearts need to be healthy to keep everything else working well. She has no concept of exercise as a means to weight loss, which is perfectly fine by me. The longer she only sees it as a means to being healthy, not skinny*, the happier I’ll be. I worry about her future body image, when other kids might pick on her for being what they perceive — what society dictates — to be overweight or even if she’s underweight, which I was growing up and into my young adulthood. Being asked by perfect strangers almost everywhere I went if I had an eating disorder (what I had was ridiculous metabolism) took its toll on my self-esteem and confidence. That I know from.

So it’s because of all the baggage that’s attached to exercise and eating healthy that I never let her see me weigh myself. Yes, I started working out again because I’d like to look and feel better. I want to shore up the wobbly bits. I want to increase my endurance, which the stairs and cardio are definitely helping with. I’m trying to make smarter choices about what I eat because without that, exercise alone won’t get me very far. Admittedly, that’s a struggle for me, but I’ve definitely been doing a lot better of late. And, most importantly, I want to be as proactive as I can regarding my health so I can see my daughter grow up.

I do attach some importance to the numbers I see on our scale. I am happy when I see that number inching down bit by bit, pound by pound. I don’t want to lose that much weight — between 5 and 7 lbs. — but I do want to lose it. When I weigh myself, it’s when I’m all by myself and Coraline isn’t there to see. Not because I’m ashamed or anything, but because I don’t want her to start attaching importance to the numbers she sees, certainly not at the tender age of 3 1/2. She just thinks the scale is this neat little thing to stand on in the hall bathroom. She has no idea what the numbers on it mean, even though I do.

Coraline healthy and confident in her own skin.

Coraline healthy and confident in her own skin.

*Rich and I never use the words “skinny” or “fat” to describe people. I’m pretty sure she still doesn’t know exactly what those words mean.

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May 5, 2014 · 8:30 AM

Finn, the Cinco de Mayo Kitty, at 18

Song Lyric of the Day:

Well, the first time that I got it I was just ten years old / I got it from some kitty next door / An’ I went to see the doctor and he gave me the cure / I think I got it some more / They give me cat scratch fever / Cat scratch fever

Ted Nugent / “Cat Scratch Fever“

When I first met my cat Finn, she mauled me and I ended up going to the hospital. Rich and I were on our first together trip, a visit to a friend’s parents’ lake house, and on our way home, Rich decided we should stop by his old apartment so we could say hi to his former roommate and check on his cat, who’d been left in the roommate’s care. Not only was the roommate not there (his new roommate let us in), but Finn was clearly pregnant (read: not taken care of that well). A cat had followed us up the stairs to the apartment door, which was ajar. Finn had her paw in the door and was growling at the other cat, so, not wanting to close the door on a pregnant cat’s paw, I reached down to gently move her so I could close the door. Next thing I know, this enraged pregnant cat is hanging from my arm by her teeth and I’m bleeding. Despite that, I was worried more about her unborn kittens than my arm. It wasn’t until she let go and Rich and I could assess the damage that we saw she’d punctured through three fingernails in addition to leaving me with lots of bite and claw marks on both hands and arms. I managed to tell Rich “I think you should take me to a hospital,” and off we went. I ended up crying in the waiting room, not only because the shock had worn off, but because Princess Diana had died the night before and the news coverage on the TVs was upsetting me further.

My hands were bathed in iodine, the doctor kept asking, “A cat did this? A house cat did this?”, and I got a couple of lousy bandages and lots of scars. In December of that year, Rich picked up Finn and her last unadopted kitten, who we named Buster, and brought them to live with me. While Buster settled right in, Finn and I had some touch-and-go moments where when I’d pet her it triggered some sort of feline PTSD, which caused her to hiss and swat at me, triggering my own feline-attack PTSD. Clearly, we got past all that.

That was 17 years ago, and today Finn is celebrating her 18th birthday, the longest I’ve ever been privileged to have a furkid. Considering that in cat years she’s the age of Methuselah, she’s in pretty good health. Her biggest issues seem to be some arthritis in her hind legs, and loss of hearing — we’re pretty sure she’s lost most if not all of her hearing. But none of that keeps her from ruling over her dogs and son with an iron paw. She may be old and tiny, but she’s still quite the mighty cat.

Finn at 18

Finn at 18

Sleepy Cat

Finn passed out on me during one of our nightly couch sessions.

PS: We’ll be treating Finn to some tuna tonight in honor of her big milestone.

 

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May 2, 2014 · 8:30 AM

The Little Social Butterfly

Song Lyric of the Day:

(When it gets loud, I turn it up) / Shake it like a bad girl up in Harlem / (When it’s too hot, I light it up) / Ooh, light it up, yeah, smoke em if you got ’em

New Politics / “Harlem“

The other day Coraline got an invitation to a friend’s birthday party, this one for a zoo extravaganza. That’s when it hit me: My 3 1/2-year-old has a more active social calendar than I do. Sure, Rich and I went to our friends’ baby shower this past weekend, which was a blast and where we made some good new friends. But that was one of our few and far between social engagements these days. Coraline, on the other hand, has been to a couple of birthday parties recently, then has two upcoming parties on consecutive weekends followed by her first ballet recital the following weekend. As for my and Rich’s social calendars, uh, well, we’ll be accompanying Coraline to two upcoming birthday parties on consecutive weekends followed by her first ballet recital the following weekend.

I do have to say, I’m proud that Coraline is nice, and well-behaved and well-liked enough to be invited to her daycare classmates’ parties, among other events. She’s also social to a fault. Just last night, Rich had to remind her that while it’s OK to say hi to and smile at people we pass or have brief encounters with, we don’t necessarily need to tell them our life stories. Let’s just say that Coraline is very well known by certain cashiers at Target, Barberito’s, and Trader Joe’s. She’s particularly fond of yelling, “I’ll see you tomorrow!” as we head out the door. After telling them what we’ve bought, where we’re going, who we’re going to see, and so forth.

Raising a confident child has definitely been at the top of my list as far as qualities I want to instill in Coraline, and so far, she’s got confidence to spare. It manifests itself in a love of performing (look for a Coraline-directed all-toddler version of Frozen coming to a playground near you in fall 2014), her imaginative play, her eagerness to make new friends everywhere she goes, even her at times let’s say unique fashion sense. So far, so good on the confidence front.

Now if I can just figure out how to help her retain her self-confidence as she grows older.

Who's a social butterfly? Why, little ole me!

Who’s a social butterfly? Why, little ole me!

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May 1, 2014 · 8:30 AM

First-World Problems: Gimpy Dogs and Bastard Bees

Song Lyric of the Day:

Treating today as though it was / The last, the final show / Get to sixty and feel no regret / It may take a little time / A lonely path, an uphill climb / Success or failure will not alter it / And do you feel scared, I do / And I won’t stop and falter

Howard Jones / “Things Can Only Get Better“

For a while now — too long, it seems — I’ve been praying for things to get better for people I care about. These are good, hardworking people who have been dealing with the kind of life stressors you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy, and it’s been hard seeing them go through these things. Not for one second did I take it for granted that things in my life were plugging along well enough in comparison, when the bottom fell out a few weeks ago. Rich and I were hit with some unexpected/unforeseen expenses, which are never fun or easy to deal with. You know how people say money doesn’t solve everything? Those people are (1) likely wealthy and (2) full of shit because having more money would help me, my friends, and my family a lot. But the worst news has been that our dog Caleb, who has been our baby since we adopted him at 13 weeks, has a tumor growing on the end of his spleen; the only saving grace is that the doctor is pretty sure it’s *not* cancerous. Caleb will very likely be getting a splenectomy in a few weeks, and will also have to have his arthritic leg operated on since he also has torn ligaments. He’s looking at between 8 and 14 weeks of recovery time per surgery, and Rich and I are looking at lots of expenses and the challenge of keeping a very active, social 11 1/2-year-old pit calm and stationary. Which means his brother Troubadour will probably be bunking at Hotel Grandparents for a few weeks because keeping those two physically separated is the only way to guarantee they won’t play and roughhouse during Caleb’s recovery.

Aside from being my and Rich's baby, Caleb is also Coraline's nana dog, always keeping a close eye on her.

Aside from being my and Rich’s baby, Caleb is also Coraline’s nana dog, always keeping a close eye on her.

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Caleb and Troubadour don’t even like to sleep apart, no matter where in the house that may be.

Did I mention the bees? In addition to the expected annual nuisance (yay, springtime!) of carpenter bees, a colony of honey bees has decided to take up residence in our home. As in the wall of our screened-in porch. They haven’t gotten into the porch, but we’ve been avoiding hanging out there since we don’t want to chance being in there if they get through the interior wall. We’re still trying to get a beekeeper a coworker recommended to come out and get them. Because honey bees are endangered and all that. At this moment in time, they are in danger of me, because if a beekeeper doesn’t get out here and remove them soon, I’ll be loading up with those cans of bee and hornet spray that shoot up to 30 feet. I want those honey-making stinged bastards out of my house NOW.

Bish, I'm in your walls! Bwahahahaha!

Bish, I’m in your walls! Bwahahahaha!
Image courtesy of A Beer for the Shower (via a Google search): http://www.abeerfortheshower.com/2013/06/the-wasp-natures-rapist.html

I sound like I’m insane, I know. But we have enough problems to deal with and the bees have kind of been the last straw/slap in the face/sting in the ass. Did I mention they’ve also created a deathly fear of any insect or bug in Coraline? I’m pretty sure it was a gnat that flew in front of her the other day that made her scream like the Easter Bunny, Chuck E. Cheese, and the boogeyman had ganged up on her. Fun times.

Still … things could be worse. Things could be worse. I know that. I am keenly aware of that. If you’ve got any spare prayers, positive thoughts, and healing vibes, please send them out to my friends and family in need of good things coming their way. And if you have any left, please send them my way so I don’t end up on PETA’s most wanted list for killing honey bees. Among other things.

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March 5, 2014 · 8:30 AM

A Conversation With Coraline: Q&A

“What does … chocolate milk turn into?”

“Pee.”

“What does … chocolate turn into?”

“Poop.”

“What does … candy turn into?”

“Poop.”

“What does … water turn into?”

“Pee.”

“What does … the fox say?”

“Ni ni ni ni ni ni ni.”

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March 4, 2014 · 8:30 AM

The Mountain Birthday Party

Song Lyric of the Day:

High on a mountain top / We live, we love, and we laugh a lot / Folks up here know what they got / High on a mountain top

Loretta Lynn / “High On a Mountain Top“

Last summer our friends hosted a party at their family’s mountain house, and since then Coraline has been obsessed with the idea of a “mountain party.” So you can imagine her delight when Rich decided to rent that same house for his 40th birthday party this past weekend. Friday night we hosted family, and Saturday night we hosted friends. We were running late both nights (maybe my fault as I put the pro in procrastination), but we managed to pull off a pretty great party each time.

Friday I made herb-crusted pork tenderloin, roasted garlic-ranch potatoes, salad, and my patented garlic rolls for a sit-down family dinner. Saturday night I made some of my better appetizers/finger foods (per Rich’s special request), while friends brought some sides and sweets. I stayed primarily indoors Saturday night instead of hanging outside by the bonfire since I was having too much fun gabbing with friends (while keeping an eye on Coraline) to head out into the cold.

Sunday turned out to be an unusually warm day, so for our last day at the cabin we enjoyed a nice bike ride, then walked to a nearby family-style restaurant for breakfast. I am still kicking myself for not grabbing my camera like I planned, since I thought, “Oh, it’s such a short walk and it’s only breakfast.” Which is why when we saw the bald eagle that had just flown over our cabin perched in a tree on the way to the restaurant I only had my phone handy to take pictures. Always take your camera, Pattie: I KNOW this. Ugh.

The best shot of the wild bald eagle I could get with my camera phone.

The best shot of the wild bald eagle I could get with my camera phone.

What I loved most about staying at the cabin was the quiet. Even though we were close to the main drag, it was so quiet most of the time that you could hear a pin drop. It was glorious. And it was a perfect setting in which to host family and friends. It means a lot to us that so many people took the time to head out there to celebrate my old man getting officially older.

All in all, I think Rich had a great time celebrating the big 4-0 this year. I know I (and Coraline) certainly enjoyed helping him usher in a new year.

Coraline helps Rich finish off the mandarin orange cake I made for his birthday.

Coraline helps Rich finish off the mandarin orange cake I made for his birthday.

You can see some pictures from Rich’s long birthday weekend here.

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February 27, 2014 · 8:30 AM

The Birthday Boy and the Ballerina

Song Lyric of the Day:

I just want you to dance with me tonight / So come on, oh baby / I just want you to dance with me tonight

Olly Murs / “Dance With Me Tonight“

Tuesday night Rich, Coraline, and I celebrated Rich’s 40th birthday. It was a tiny celebration, just our little family, with a bigger celebration planned for the weekend. But we had to mark Rich’s big day on the day of. I made sure to preorder a German chocolate (Rich’s favorite) torte, since birthday cake at a birthday party is sacrosanct to Coraline, and we couldn’t have a devastated 3-year-old bringing down Rich’s birthday. And did I mention that German chocolate is Rich’s favorite? Coraline also insisted on having themed plates because, again, those are absolutely necessary for a birthday. I managed to find some Justice League plates to satisfy Rich’s request for Superman (he politely passed on Coraline’s suggestions of Woody or Buzz plates) and mismatched Avengers napkins since that was what was in stock. When Coraline and I picked up the cake, we also got a Mylar balloon that said “Happy Birthday” on it (she wanted to be traditional), a balloon which is now being moved around our upstairs by one very happy, oddball tabby cat. Coraline and I sang the birthday song, we tore into that cake, and Rich opened his presents.  All in all, I think it was a nice little celebration with just the three of us.

Can you tell who was most excited to be celebrating Rich's birthday?

Can you tell who was most excited to be celebrating Rich’s birthday?

Rich and Coraline pose for a birthday photo.

Rich and Coraline pose for a birthday photo.

Last night was a big night for Coraline (and us as well): her first ballet class. Technically it was a tap/ballet/creative movement/gymnastic class, since dance studios’ ballet season doesn’t begin until August. But to Coraline, it was all about the ballet; she’s been asking to take classes for months and now she’s finally old enough.

Ready to head to her first ballet class

Ready to head to her first ballet class

Of course, being old enough to take ballet doesn’t guarantee her paying attention to the teacher, which was a given. Despite her squirrelly attention span, though, she gave it her enthusiastic all. Plus, she was absolutely adorable to watch, as were her classmates — bright tutus everywhere.

Tap shoes on and ready to dance

Tap shoes on and ready to dance

Coraline enjoyed the class so much that she was actually pissed off when it ended and we told her it was time to leave. She sat down with her back to us, crossed her arms, and sulked. She brightened considerably when we told her she could go again. Now Rich and I just need to figure out which class schedule will work best for us.

Practicing making some noise with her tap shoes

Practicing making some noise with her tap shoes

At the end of each day, I ask Coraline what her favorite part of her day was. Some days it’s playing outside at daycare, others it’s hanging out with her grandma, doing artwork, or riding the train at the mall. Last night when I asked her that question, she smiled and said simply, “Ballet.”

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February 26, 2014 · 8:30 AM

A Conversation With Coraline: Baby Gaga

“I’m going to have a baby sister.”

“Oh, you are now, are you? Because that’s news to me.”

“Yes. And she will be named Baby Gaga!”

“You know that wouldn’t be her real name, right?”

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